Pastor Argues Masturbation is a Form of Homosexuality
Pastor Mark Driscoll of Mars Hill Church in Seattle really brings the LOLZ in his ebook Porn Again Christian. The only trouble is that he doesn’t seem to realize that the joke is on him.
Driscoll’s remarks on the inherent gayness of masturbating in particular rubbed us the wrong way.
Second, masturbation is a form of monosexuality because it is sex that does not include another person. Since sex is given for such purposes as oneness (Gen. 2:24), intimate knowledge (Gen. 4:1), and comfort (2 Sam. 12:24), having sex with oneself seems to miss some of the significant biblical reasons for sexual intimacy.
Third, masturbation is often done in haste because of the mortifying embarrassment of possibly getting caught in the act. Subsequently, masturbation encourages a man to become a notorious minute-man who will not be well skilled in the self-control necessary to satisfy a wife.
Fourth, masturbation can establish a pattern of laziness. If a single man wants to have an orgasm, he needs to first become a man and undergo the hard work of courting and marrying a woman. If a married man wants to have an orgasm, he needs to first undergo the hard work of loving, leading, and romancing his wife. But, lazy men are prone to rub one out in the shower each morning rather than undergo the labors usually associated with responsible masculine married life.
OMG! While it is refreshing (like a shower each morning!) to hear a religious leader openly acknowledge that masturbation exists, it’s creepy to see Driscoll run right over the rails with his beliefs. Likewise, a pastor using the terms “rub one out” and “minute-man” gives us 8th grade health class flashbacks, peppered with a bit of Missy Elliot of course.
And don’t even get me started on Driscoll’s comment about the masturbator “watching himself in a mirror and being turned on by his own male body.” Methinks the lady doth protest too much, if you know what I’m saying…
All of this of course begs the question, is it gay when gay people masturbate? And if so, what’s the harm?