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You Can’t Make This Up: Rick Santorum Launches C.U.M.

Posted by on Jan 23, 2012 in OMGWTFLOL | 17 comments

Honestly y’all. The stuff we get here at UB sometimes amazes me. Whether it’s incredibly offensive cartoons, radio hosts with little-to-no sense of logic, or a man marrying the corpse of his girlfriend, we’ve seen it all.

Despite being exposed to myriad odd stories, one of the biggest, most common, and frothiest contributors to our “WTF” stories is none other than Rick Santorum. The man has done so many WTF-worthy things that I’m starting to think he’s going out of his way to make everyone think he’s a nutjob.

His newest campaign move is no different.

Mr. Frothy-Mix recently launched a new campaign… thing (strategy, move, misstep, blunder, horror, etc). And, much like his last name, the title of this “measure” is just incredibly unfortunate.

It’s called Conservatives Unite Moneybomb. Literally C.U.M. I mean really. Like… what?

In an effort to avoid giving Santorum’s site any traffic (especially from a place like Unicorn Booty), I’ve pasted a picture of Operation Manjuice for your viewing pleasure.

I’m not even entirely sure what a “moneybomb” is, but it’s strikingly close to “money shot,” so I suppose the name is fitting.

What’s even more funny is that, after getting Tweeted all over the Internet in what must have been a flurry of “I can’t believe this actually exists” couple of days, the site has been removed from Santorum’s website. I waded through a Santorum-rich nightmare trying to find any link at all to this page, or any stories about it, and got nothing.

What used to be the splash page for his main campaign website is now gone, and there is absolutely no trace of it (those of you so inclined can find the site by Googling “rick santorum cum.” Hilariously, it’s right near the top of the page. Lawls.).

I’m sure you are all, like I am, wondering how in the world this campaign move actually passed the initial, “Hey, naming your new donation-gathering program after semen would be a great idea” phase. I can only hope that there’s someone in the Santorum campaign working for the LGBT and doing everything he/she can to sabotage him. That would be seriously awesome, as long as it produces more comedy such as this.

It’s been a bad (few) day(s) for Rick Santorum.