Cynthia Nixon Round 3: Fiiiiine, I’m Bisexual

Posted by Kevin Farrell on Jan 30, 2012 in The Critic | 19 comments

Cynthia Nixon pulls off no hair quite nicely.

A newly bald Cynthia Nixon continues to play damage control with the LGBT community after two interviews last week in which she first said that being gay was a choice for her, and then later that nobody likes bisexuals.

Let’s see if she can finally clear this whole mess up in a third interview, shall we?

“My recent comments in The New York Times were about me and my personal story of being gay. I believe we all have different ways we came to the gay community and we can’t and shouldn’t be pigeon-holed into one cultural narrative which can be uninclusive and disempowering. However, to the extent that anyone wishes to interpret my words in a strictly legal context I would like to clarify:

“While I don’t often use the word, the technically precise term for my orientation is bisexual. I believe bisexuality is not a choice, it is a fact. What I have ‘chosen’ is to be in a gay relationship.

“As I said in the Times and will say again here, I do, however, believe that most members of our community — as well as the majority of heterosexuals — cannot and do not choose the gender of the persons with whom they seek to have intimate relationships because, unlike me, they are only attracted to one sex.

“Our community is not a monolith, thank goodness, any more than America itself is. I look forward to and will continue to work toward the day when America recognizes all of us as full and equal citizens.”

And there you have it. Cynthia Nixon identifies as bisexual, and never meant to imply that sexuality was a choice for everyone, even though that’s exactly what she did.

There’s an argument to be made that Nixon’s coming out as a bisexual was only made possible by invoking the wrath of the entire LGBT community first. You know, since nobody likes the bisexuals. Zing!

Happy now?

meh2

she just sounds like one of those people who is constantly putting her foot in her mouth. just leave her be, she’s not worth anyone’s “wrath.” honestly, who cares?
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1365172585 James Rodgers Jr

To be fair though, I’ve seen a fair amount of hatesauce slathered (how’s that for metaphor?) on the bisexual community by both the LGBT community and the heterosexual community.

Anonymous

I have definitely felt this as a bisexual. Gay women have advised me not to mention that I’m also attracted to men since it could cause some of them to hate me.

http://www.facebook.com/tehange Angela Dabney

I was attacked by a group of a eleven lesbians for admitting to being bisexual. My response has been to pretty much disassociate myself with the community, which is sad and probably not my best option, but I won’t lie or pretend to be anything I’m not just because people are jerks. That said, I don’t think it’s as personal as it feels, seeing as I’ve had MANY relationships with bisexual women and every one left me for a man. Thing is, that isn’t because they were bisexual, or because of men, but because they were douches or flaky people. Or they were waiting for something better to come along (and if that’d been another woman, I bet they’d have gone there). Those come in all shapes, sizes, colors, and creeds, but I guess sometimes when you feel like you have to protect yourself, you pick a common and easy identifying factor and stick with it, even when it’s wrong.

I forgive people for that ignorance, but it still hurts feeling like there is this big community that COULD understand you, and understands transexuals, the genderqueer, and whatever else, but sometimes chooses to exclude you or make you a butt of their jokes. However true or untrue it is, depending on the group really.

Joshua Thomas

Well good for her. This is very well said.
http://www.facebook.com/jeff.coulter1 Jeff Coulter

I agree with James. And while I think that Ms. Nixon has muddied the waters a bit, I think she has proven the point that many gay activists want people to be gay according to precise definitions. Usually the ones that the activist prefers. Sexual and affectional preferences are way too complicated for that. How about we just let people decide for themselves?
Anonymous

It is VERY difficult because people want to keep pigeonholing (that doesn’t look right, really doesn’t) bisexuals into either being gay or being straight. It’s like: “You can’t like both, that’s not possible.” Almost like it’s “not allowed”.

Got news, it IS possible, it’s allowed, and like Ms. Nixon, I CHOOSE to be in a lesbian relationship.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_562P7GCE5KVYDVIN6GFJINVGCU Dark Lesson

How exactly does one CHOOSE to fall in love? I did not realize that having romantic feelings for someone is a matter of conscious control in order for it to become a CHOICE.
The reason why that stupid asshat shouldn’t have run her mouth in that manner is that someone out there will use her “arguments” to stick their offspring in an “ex-gay” facility in the hopes of fixing his or her “choices”.

Anonymous

I could say “poor choice of wording”, however, I stand by my initial comment.

I can choose to pursue a relationship with a man if I wish. If I wanted to be in a heterosexual relationship, I could be. I could make the choice to pursue men exclusively.

I can choose to pursue a relationship with a woman if I so desire as well. It just so happens I do prefer being with women and I am the HAPPIEST in a lesbian relationship. But because I am bisexual, I do have a choice in the matter, I think. I’m sorry that you view Ms. Nixon to be a “stupid asshat”, it saddens me that you would resort to childish name calling. Oh, the word you’re looking for is their. As in possessive. Not there as in location. When you master the concept of those words, perhaps I’ll take you a little more serious.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_562P7GCE5KVYDVIN6GFJINVGCU Dark Lesson

And you fail to understand that this isn’t ABOUT YOU, nor it is about HER. The world does not revolve around either of your egoes or your choices. They are completely and utterly irrelevant when your words give bigoted parents and other people the excuse to bully, torment and MURDER gay children. Perhaps when you wrap your mind around that idea you’ll be ready for a serious discussion.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Marckey-Davis/100000819151338 Marckey Davis

“And there you have it. Cynthia Nixon identifies as bisexual, and never meant to imply that sexuality was a choice for everyone, even though that’s exactly what she did.” Still you are not listening. She never said that she made a choice with her sesuality. she said she chose to be a woman rather than a man right now. never said or implied that she was ruling out men. She is in a monogamous (sp) relation ship. This in it’s self precludes her practicing her bisexuality. She is still attracted to both but evidently her heart has chosen one person who happens to be a woman whom she is also attracted too.
it is this kind of statements that get things off track and fuels rumors and incorrect information.
In my oppinion she has been very clear from the beginning. I think some people just like to start sh*&! maybe to sell articles blogs and such.
Get over it people. Think and use some integrity before you spew crap!

http://www.facebook.com/sammael88 Matthew Williamson

Yes, she was very clear in the beginning. That’s why she recanted most of her statement and gave 2 additional interviews to clarify what she meant. :end sarcasm: And yes, she did say her sexuality was a choice, and she used those words to say it. That’s why there was a backlash and that’s why she issued the above statement. Or did you just read the title of this post and immediately jump down to comment on something you clearly didn’t read and/or didn’t understand?

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=853214878 Raymond Weaver

O.K. Are we done with this, now?
Michael Cooke

It’s not her fault, but the anti gay atmosphere rationalizing Christian based intolerance on the ‘choice’ of the homosexual means that if you are Bisexual, it is critically important politically to say so.
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=768866084 Damian Carvalho

She never implied that sexuality was a choice for everyone. She stated it was for herself. Way to slant things. If I said that I like apple butter, does that mean I am implying that everyone likes apple butter? It’s the same logic. And the way people have attacked Cynthia Nixon about her sexuality is just shameful. Especially from the gay community.

http://www.facebook.com/sammael88 Matthew Williamson

The issue was never about her sexuality, it was about her poor word choice from the start. And apparently she understood that because her word choice is what the 2 following posts were attempting to fix, not her sexuality.

http://www.facebook.com/finmagik Alexandra Moore

If you just SAID that first place then you would end yp looking like jerk. Also now you give us bisexuals an even WORSE NAME.
http://www.facebook.com/tehange Angela Dabney

Agreeing with James. I have been abused by both sides NUMEROUS TIMES for being bisexual. Told to stop riding the fence, that I’m doing for attention, that I’m just a slut, that they don’t exist. After living attracted to PEOPLE, and not GENDERS for 31 years, I’m having trouble buying it’s just a phase I’m going through. Sorry.

There is a TON of bigotry directed toward bisexuals in the LGBT community and as stupid as this woman has been, I can at least get her not wanting to use the B word. To be fair, though, some people have no problem with it. To also be fair, I know SEVERAL homosexual men who have confessed being bisexual to me but unwilling to openly admit it because they get it even worse than I do as a bisexual woman. I guess we at least get off light thanks to pornography and fashion and whatever ridiculous bit else…

As long as we’re more into guys or femme enough.
Christine Grone

This depresses me. I am lost in the waves on the guidelines here… I get turned on by men, women, and transgender. I can’t help it. I get attracted to a person and sexual orientation goes out the window. Why should we pick sides in this. Can’t I make love and be in a relationship with whom ever makes me sexually turned on and inter-personally happy without having to define that relationship to anyone else?! I feel this debate of definitive lines of sexual orientation is counter productive to what the LGBT community is trying to achieve with in society. I have had happy and very loved filled relationships and feel I do not need to label myself even though I come across as a bi-sexual woman. Why should we do that to ourselves when we all are in support of just loving who makes us feel fulfilled and happy. Cynthia Nixon should never of had to state a defense of her orientation. She does have a point though; we can not control who we are attracted to but, we do choose to be in a relationship with the person who can turn us on so well considering that attraction and sex makes up a large part of a healthy relationship; and that is a beautiful thing regardless who labels it.

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Cynthia Nixon Round 3: Fiiiiine, I’m Bisexual

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