Heeeeeere Come the Gay Divorces!
Now that we’ve made it entirely through the backlog of same-sex couples who spent decades in committed relationships before being permitted to finally marry – the first wave of gay marriages, if you will – we can all expect a boom in that future topic of 4 PM syndicated television programming: gay divorce.
New York Magazine has the alarming deets:
But just in case you thought you were going to be able to get a Brandi Glanville-quickie Vegas divorce to go along with your Britney Spears-quickie Vegas wedding, think again!
But, by and large, even if states have no residency requirement to marry, they do have a residency requirement to divorce”—meaning that if you live in Georgia but married in California during its twenty-week “marriage window” in 2008, you can’t get divorced in Georgia, which does not recognize your marriage anyway, and you probably can’t get divorced in California either, unless you take up residency there, perhaps for as long as a year. The vast majority of couples can’t afford or even arrange that, especially if they’re feuding.
“It gives wedlock a whole new meaning,” says Sommer. “They’re trapped.”
Till death do you part! BWAHAHA!
Here’s the thing, team. Yes, it’s easy to get caught up in the rapture and glamour of your state legalizing same-sex marriage, but statistically, you probably shouldn’t marry your current partner if you’re 22 years old and living in your first studio apartment. I mean, a studio apartment alone is basically impetus enough for divorce. So cool your marriage jets and leave it to the couples that are truly ready for it. Because even then, the odds are still stacked against you.
Divorce is no joke. And the only people that are going to be laughing when you begin the costly process of separating are Orson Scott Card and Maggie Gallagher over at NOM. Don’t make a mockery out of the LGBT community’s crossing of the marriage threshold.