colby melvin

Not Here For Likes: AdamMale’s New Brand Ambassador Colby Melvin Opens Up

AdamMale announced activist and model Colby Melvin as its new brand ambassador. To kick off the partnership they released a hilarious parody video, “Dildo Dodgeball,” starring Melvin with legendary drag stars Jackie Beat and Willam Belli.

“Colby Melvin is the perfect fit,” stated Lee Grutman, media strategist at AdamMale. “He’s sexy, smart, outgoing and has a great sense of humor. Colby is a tireless advocate committed to helping gay men feel comfortable with their sexuality and does an incredible job reaffirming that sex is a natural and wonderful thing. Colby shares AdamMale’s commitment to giving back by donating his time and talent to charitable organizations. We could not have asked for a better brand ambassador.”

We had the opportunity to chat with the 29-year-old hunk who opened up about his struggle with mental illness, his thoughts on the upcoming Logo reality show Fire Island and the shocking discovery he made on a dating app in his hometown.

How do you define yourself as a sexual advocate?

I am from Lafayette, Louisiana, a very Catholic area in the South. We had abstinence-only education. We were told if you are gay, you are going to go hell. If you masturbate, you are going to go to hell. Very puritanical, fire and brimstone sort of thing. That’s it. We didn’t learn about anything sexual.

It wasn’t until my adult life when I started learning about sex. To me, it was always something presented as bad and raunchy, and through my years as an adult male, I have come to better understand sex. There was a huge learning curve for me. Learning about STDs. Learning if you are a bottom and douching. Just learning about sex as a gay men because not only did I not have regular sex eduction, I didn’t have education about sex with other men, which is very different. I have learned so many things and I believe having a better understanding of your sexuality and sexual health is important. Unless we talk about sex, we can’t talk about sex health.

For this generation, I don’t want to just talk about sex in a raunchy way. I want us to talk about sex in a way that is casual. We should be able to talk about it. If we’re not talking about it, people won’t have fulfilling sex lives and they will be putting themselves at risk unnecessarily.

How does that fit into your brand ambassadorship with AdamMale?

What I am really looking forward to with AdamMale is that I want to be the next Dan Savage for the gay community. I think presenting sex and education and exploration in a fun way without seeming like education is how we can tackle a lot of these topics. From, “I have been in a committed relationship and I am really bored but I don’t really want to open it up. What can we do?” Learning about sex toys can turn your world upside down. Sex is supposed to be fun.

Some of the things I want to talk about aren’t just getting off but how can we talk about STDs or checking for testicular cancer. One of the ideas I brought up to AdamMale that they were into is doing a video, “How to Fondle Balls.” Me with a porn star briefly talking; we drop our pants, blurred out genitals and then we grab each other’s testicles. It’s a video for how to check for testicular cancer by yourself or with a friend.

If caught early enough, there is a 90% recovery rate. Now most people don’t know how to check for it and they don’t know anything about it. But the more that we are talking about sex, the more we are able to talk about sexual health. 

People have a lot of questions, and sometimes people have questions they don’t even know they have. I love that AdamMale is down for making this more approachable and more real. And taking it out of this dirty fetish raunchy realm that people are scared to go. 

The video is the gayest thing I have seen in my whole entire life and I have seen some gay shit.

Yeah. It was super fun.

Even when it comes to entertainment, we don’t see that many gay men honestly and openly talking about their sex lives. Why do you think that is?

I think that comes from the stereotype that gays are just these horny rabbits who are over sexualized. People get angry and turned off about just being that stereotype. Well, yeah! Hello? We are gay men. What makes us gay men is that we have sex with other men.

Exactly!

Of course we should be able to talk about it. It’s what makes us this identity.

Speaking of controversy, that reminds me of Fire Island. What do you think of the show?

I don’t really watch reality TV. People get very pissed off about shows like that. Or the gay Bachelor and they say that just paints us in this negative stereotype as being these horny gay men. But those people exist. Or like that new show Whatever Happens at The Abbey. When people watch Vanderpump Rules, do they think that all straight people are like that? I don’t think it’s bad that that segment of the gay population has a show. It’s television. That’s what sells. There is a reason why they are putting it on.

I think that a lot of people fight the idea. They believe they are automatically going to be seen as any portrayal of gay people in the media. I think that’s a very old school way of thinking.

So you live in Denver? Why did you move there?

I absolutely love the community here in Denver. I am from Louisiana originally and I didn’t want to go back there. But I miss having that community. Culturally wise, the people in Denver are very similar in that way. I have had such a good time every time that I visited. I spent years in Los Angeles, I was just ready to get out and change up life a little. People enjoy being outside here. It’s a fun progressive town, fun people, lots to do.

Did you move for a man?

Hell no!

Pot is legal.

Pot is legal but I just came from California and pot is technically legal there too.

Alright! You are just bouncing between all the pot legalized states.

I am bouncing around between these pretty liberal cities.

That’s awesome. I live in New York City and it is not legal here. I don’t smoke pot but I did get really high a few years ago off this candy and I was high for three days.

Damn girl. That is not right!

It was actually edibles from Denver. It was this candy my friend had bought while on a trip there. And I took a little Saturday and I swear to God I was still high Monday morning.

I have never had that experience!

Oh my God! Edibles will do you nasty. Especially that legal shit from Denver because it is so potent. It was this weird taffy candy so it was hard to eat. I accidentally ate too much.

Oh, so you just kept going. That is not a good idea.

Keeping it 󾭻

Posted by Colby Melvin on Tuesday, August 2, 2016

I saw the video you did in 2016 where you candidly opened up about your struggle with depression. I loved seeing that. One of the things that is happening with social media today is it heightens isolation for a lot of people because they are constantly seeing these fake realities of people being projected out there. I love it when someone like you who has a huge social media presence and who uses it for self-promoting is also super honest about issues you’re actually going through as well.

For me, I have a social responsibility especially to the gay community to use my platform for something other than vanity. In the end, that doesn’t mean shit. Likes, comments, all the doting and gloating doesn’t mean anything. If I am not doing anything positive to affect the world with it, it’s bullshit.

However, that being said, people don’t just voluntarily go to education. They go to half-naked pictures, they go to things like that. So for me, my model has always been a bait-and-switch tactic, a mixture of sexy underwear pics but then conversations about [topics like] gay marriage, the election and suicidal depression.

I was also going through a rough time. I was like, I need to be honest about this and I can reach out to a lot of people and tell them I know what that loneliness feels like. I know what not feeling alone can do for someone. After doing that video, I got thousands of messages from people telling me about their own struggles with different types of mental illness. Very distinctively, I remember three messages from people that said they had plans to go home and kill themselves that night until they saw my video. That’s why I believe the social outreach is so important, because it can literally change people’s lives and save people’s lives.

We can also have fun along the way. It’s not always so dark and bleak. People see me through a social media lens. They only get to see what I choose for them to see. They don’t get the full picture. They never thought for a million years that I could be going through the same struggle they are going through. For me, it is very important to break down that veil.

colby melvin

Do you have any funny stories from any of the dating apps? Do you get recognized?

Oh, I get recognized all the time and then everybody reports me for being a fake profile.

That’s hilarious.

Actually, I have a story of all stories for you and this has never been out there before. I came out at 22 after I graduated college, so I was never out back home in Louisiana. I had gone home for a holiday or something. Back home, there really isn’t a gay scene, so I only had apps to meet other guys. I went back home and pulled it up curious who is gay in my hometown. I’m scrolling through and was like, “Is that?” So, I click on it. Lo and behold, who do I see? My dad. I came to find out that it was definitely him. Scarred for life.

Wow! So is your dad gay?

I hadn’t had contact with him in a long time so it was a real shock. Under further investigation it turns out he is bisexual because is also married to a woman. He wasn’t in my life for most of it, so it was a huge shock.

I actually have stories that are very similar to that that I will one day share with the world, but I thought you were going to say a hot teacher!

Well, I have one of those, too! After graduating, I started go-go dancing at the local bar just to make a little bit of money. And then in walks my high school science teacher who had apparently come out since I graduated. Well, he comes in, and he is like, “I want a lap dance from you.” I totally gave my high school science teacher a lap dance.