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The Fart of War: Behold, A Scroll of Epic Japanese Fart Battles!

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AWESOMENESS WARNING: Some of the pics below are too badass for un-epic workplaces (NSFW).

Today is National Pass Gas Day! (Appropriately, Jan. 6 was National Bean Day.) In celebration, we thought we’d take a look at the fart’s role in art and history.

Around 1846, a group of Edo period Japanese artists illustrated a 34-long foot scroll depicting He-Gassen (屁合戦, literally a “fart battle”). The illustrations show men and women blowing away horses, trees and entire tea-parties using gale-force blasts of anal wind.

Some art historians see the scroll (and other similar drawings) as xenophobic political cartoons of Japanese fart-warriors attacking invasive Westerners; the Tokugawa shogunate at that time made a habit of arresting and executing most European visitors. But considering that most of the figures in this scroll seem to be Japanese, other art historians view He-Gassen art as nothing more than dirty visual humor.

No matter your interpretation, the scrolls remain a hilarious (and collectable) part of (f)art history. In 1992, Christie’s auctioned off 12 He-Gassen prints for $1,580, but you can enjoy some He-Gassen images at Japan’s Waseda University Library archive and below.

Fart-warriors used to roam the illustrated countryside, using butt-blasts to knock off hats and blow men off their feet!

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The threat was so great, that other fart-soldiers used fans to turn flatulence against their makers.

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No one was safe from The Great Fart War! Even if you held your nose or hid behind an upturned table, one well-directed toot could blast a hole through even the sturdiest furniture!

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Fart-warriors terrorized innocent men …

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… horses and their riders …

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… innocent cats roaming the streets …

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… wicked trees …

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… entire tea parties …

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… and God help you if you were an emperor or an elected official; two naked women would team up and use their farts to levitate you and leave you crashing in stinky robes—the indignity of it all!

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The only way to ward off fart attackers was to collect a big ol’ bag of farts and then unleash them on the unsuspecting warriors!

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Start saving your farts for the next National Pass Gas Day (Jan. 7, 2018)! Who knows? Maybe you’ll save us all in a giant fart war!

(Previously published July 3, 2016.)