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Stallion Semen Energy Drink Is A Tasteful Alternative

Posted on
wildfoods festival. new zealand

"Drink me."

Red Bull may give you wings, but stallion semen gives you balls. Or at least that’s the thinking behind a new energy drink making its debut in New Zealand. The drink, available in cherry, licorice and banoffee (think banana cream pie), is served in flavored shots to combat that heavy alkaline horse balljuice taste we all know so well.

The semen is real, and is collected by breeders in artificial horse vaginas. Yes, artificial horse vaginas.

Aol News reports:

The latest crazy candidate for a food fad may prove to be quite a mouthful.

Raise your glass if you fancy a shot of horse semen, a purported “delicacy” that will debut at the Wildfoods Festival in Hokitika, New Zealand, in March.

“It is sort of quirky, I suppose,” festival organizer Mike Keenan told AOL News, with Kiwi understatement.

“It is the protein of the stallion. It is going to be tastefully done.”

Several New Zealand athletic teams swear by the sauce stuff, claiming it “is better than Viagra.” Wait, now I’m confused. Is this thing an energy drink or an energy drink? Bull semen and deer penis treats have debuted in recent years at the same foodie festival, which has us asking WHAT THE HELL IS UP WITH FOOD IN NEW ZEALAND? Are salads not an option there? Do they not have chickens and cows? Was there some sort of potato famine?

Also, while writing this post, I came across the video below. Nature is so weird.

Would you give unicorn horse semen a try?

Via Aol News

  • Pup McKeenan

    wait till you see elephants mating.

  • I never realized how badly we need a rape hot-line for Zebras…