That, my friends, is a whole lot of Azzle. Vajazzle.me, the good folks who made applying rhinestones to your vagina a worldwide sensation, are proud to announce something for the fellas. Pejazzling is logically Vajazzling for men. You can practically hear worldwide gay blog traffic quadrupling.
Now you can treat your penis like it’s the diamond encrusted totem pole you’ve always known it to be, and don’t even get me started on those disco balls of yours.
‘Men wear diamond watches and bling earrings – this is no different,’ says self-confessed Pejazzler, Mark Wright.
He advises users shave the hair before applying the crystals, or for the ‘very hairy’, a judicious waxing or laser session could be necessary.
The £6-£9 stickers come in barbed wire and geometric shapes, but an iron cross and red lips design have proved the most popular.
Any good looking bloke can wear Pejazzles,’ he continues. Prince William perhaps?
Yeah, he could definitely wear them,’ Mark says, looking thoughtful for a moment before continuing earnestly:
‘But I’m not sure Prince William is the Pejazzling type.’
Yes. By all means let me go invest in a $2,000 laser treatment to burn the pubic hair follicles out of my body so that I may luxuriate in the application of Swarovski crystals down my penis. The only question here is what to Pejazzle my junk into?
Should I go for the red head and white shaft lollipop-inspired look? Or maybe create one of those Egyptian gold wraparound snakes encircling my manhood? Is a Pikachu shooting a thunderbolt out of the question? Decisions, decisions!
Will YOU be Pejazzling?