westboro baptist church, freedom of speech

Westboro Baptist Church Vs. Anonymous: Who’s Fibbing?

westboro baptist church, freedom of speech
"It wasn't us...yet."

Wikileaks-affiliated hacker ubergroup Anonymous’ threat to dismantle the Westboro Baptist Church (The hatiest hateballs spewing forth hate you’ve ever hated to hear of, no doubt) made big news yesterday. The story continues to unfold today.

Anonymous has put out a press release suggesting that Westboro Baptist Church made the whole thing up.

Dear Phred Phelps and WBC Phriends,

So we’ve been hearing a lot about some letter that we supposedly sent you this morning. Problem is, we’re a bit groggy and don’t remember sending it. Our best guess is that you heard about us on that newfangled TV of yours and thought we might be some good money for your little church.

You thought you could play with Anonymous. You observed our rising notoriety and thought you would exploit our paradigm for your own gain. And then, you thought you could lure some idiots into a honeypot for more IPs to sue.

This is not so foreign to us; as you may have heard, we trade in Lulz. You just do not have enough to offer right now.

While Anonymous thanks you for your interest, and would certainly like to take a break and have some fun with you guys, we have more pressing matters to deal with at the moment. But, we will keep this application on file, and will certainly contact you if any openings become available in future.

Next time, don’t call us. We’ll call you.

Additionally, as your “Press Release” failed to understand: When Anonymous says we support free speech, we mean it. We count Beatrice Hall among our Anonymous forebears: “I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.”

Do some among our number hate you and your cynical exploitation of your human rights for monetary gain? Of course. But the MoralFags are also the first to admit that they are, in fact, your rights to exploit.

In closing, let us assure you: We are not BAWWWING sissies, nor are we afraid of your false god; we’re just really busy. Stay tuned, and we’ll come back to play another day. We promise.

To the Media: Just because it was posted on AnonNews doesn’t mean every single Anon is in agreement, in fact in this case it doesn’t even mean a single Anon is in agreement. Next time, if you could give us a few minutes to put all our paperwork in order, we’ll be sure to let you know what we’re up to. (LOL)

To Anonymous: It’s a trap. They’ve got their ports wide open to harvest IPs to sue. Don’t DDoS, and boycott Operation Westboro. If you really want to continue messing with them, just send them a few male prostitutes and faxes of goatse. Nothing more.

(Note: This letter was written by more than 20 Anons, at the same time, and none of them were inbred family members. Unlike that other, shitty “Press Release”.)

We are Anonymous. We are legion. We do not forgive. We do not forget. Expect us.

Hmm. So the Westboro Baptist Church made the whole thing up for press and potential lawsuits? It sounds like it was all for naught. Anonymous might not have been targeting WBC before, but they certainly will be now. “Stay tuned, and we’ll come back to play another day. We promise.

Anonymous raises a good point though, and one that is certainly topical in today’s 24 hours news climate. What is considered free speech? English judges have ruled that handing out pamphlets suggesting gays be killed is not protected under free speech laws, and churches discriminating against gays and lesbians is no longer either. Shouting “Fire!” in a crowded movie theater isn’t protected by free speech because it puts the safety of others at risk, so should operating a website (In this case GodHatesFags.com) that encourages people to cause harm to a minority group be protected as well?

As speech becomes increasingly powerful through a variety of mediums in a tech-heavy world (For instance, this little website we started last year is read by 5,000 people a day now), does the idea of free speech need to be revisited and hashed out again? It certainly seems like an increasing number of Americans could use a tutorial on the difference between your right to say something, and whether or not it’s a good idea to do so.

We’re looking forward to seeing how the Anonymous/Westboro Baptist Church e-war develops. We expect WBC to respond to Anonymous’ press release quite soon. Stay tuned.

  • Jim

    Wait. I’m really confused. Because the first “release” was WAY too literate for any of Phelps’ inbred, snake-handling, tongue-speaking, willfully-ignorant flock to have composed. Hmm…maybe they had help from those sneaky Mormons – just look at the bang-up work they did for the Catholic Church on the Prop 8 issue here in California.